In my last post I mentioned that a big change was coming; Something huge that would affect my life in a big way and that I still wasn’t sure how I felt about it.
Perhaps next time I shouldn’t be so cryptic – I genuinely lost count of how many people emailed/Tweeted/FB’d me asking if I were pregnant! (Hello waking nightmare!)
So instead of going through all the messages, carefully denying them all while keeping a diplomatic ‘You are still my friend but I can’t tell you my secret’ tone, I thought I’d just throw it all out there:
I’m leaving Mexico.
That’s right. On the 17-month anniversary of when I left Wales, I’ll be flying out of the country that’s been a bigger home to me than the place I was born. I’ll be leaving behind friends, lovers, colleagues, students, good tequila, year-round sunshine, and chili that goes on everything.
It breaks my heart that I have to leave here. I love this part of the world and feel as though it’s definitely where I belong but I’ve also gotten to the point where I have new dreams I want to chase and, unfortunately, being here isn’t going to make them come true any time soon.
Two years ago, my dream was to come to Mexico and experience life here. I scrimped and saved money, worked overtime every day, and sold all my belongings to make that a reality. Now I need to start saving again for my new goals and need to go to a different place to do that.
So what’s happening in the next few months?
On April 2nd, I fly out of Mexico City:
And I’m squealing upon seeing this again because, while it’s sad that I’m leaving, that’s how excited I am about where I’m off to first.
I’m going to New York for a couple of weeks to experience the other side of the United States. Last year I explored the happy, sunny communities of California; Now I want to experience the raw, artistic inspiration that New York is supposed to be. They say writers flock to New York the way actors flock to Los Angeles. I guess I’m going to be temporarily joining the ranks of those looking to the city for stimulation, motivation and creative encouragement.
PLUS, I get to see the beautiful Cerena, my Transatlantic Twin and maker of birthday gifts like this:
I’m hoping the two of us will create good memories and have fun times. I’m suspecting we’ll end up accidentally erasing it all from our heads with the crazy shit we’ll get up to.
Time will tell. Should be a laugh.
Then on April 13th, I fly out of New York:
I’m predicting ‘Zombie mode’ as the state my brain will be in once I’m back in Britain.
And look at that! I get to see Reykjavik! … Or, at least the airport. … For all of an hour and a half.
So, yeah, I’m returning to my homeland nearly 18 months after I left it. I’m excited to see my family; I’m excited to see my friends; And I’m excited to see all the old places again.
I’m still not sure how I feel about the fact that I’ll probably be there for the whole summer before taking off to the next place (A lot of schools start recruiting teachers for September) but it’ll definitely be an experience that’ll push me forward, onwards and upwards to my next dreams.
I booked these tickets at the beginning of the year and, to tell the truth, it’s been tough coming to terms with the fact that I’m leaving a place I love so much. Not only that but New York and seeing my parents’ faces are the two things that are on my mind every second that I’m awake.
I want to enjoy and make the most out of the little time I have left in Mexico City but I really am distracted by thoughts of the coming six weeks.
Not to mention the fact that I may be having a repeat of the little mental breakdown I had last time I moved countries. Remember this?
Little things have been happening over the last two weeks that could indicate that I’m starting to go completely batshit with the ridiculous amount of stress I put on myself again. Or it could just be PMS. Because I get that shit bad like a motherfucker.
Whatever it is, I don’t need it so expect a few ranty, this-doesn’t-make-sense-but-I’m-writing-it-anyway posts shoved down your throat between now and my departure date. Writing might be the only thing that keeps me half sane.
So there it is …
No impending baby but lots of impending hugs for those of you I’m either leaving or returning to.
*Lion King Style* Be Prepaaaaaaaaaaared.
Do you get stressed before travelling/a big move? What do you do to cope/keep calm?